waitress: i'm sorry we're all out of mozzarella sticks
waitress: sir please stop cyring

doctorwhothefuckareyou:

kailivesinabox:

in french we don’t say “i love you”, we say “vous recevez une heure supplémentaire dans la piscine à balles” which roughly translates to “you are my sun, my stars, my everything” and i think that’s beautiful

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(via tyazmorgan)

probablycryingreview:

MEAGAN MAGUIRE: INTIMATE OMENS

intimate omens is spooky.  it rhymes sometimes.  we usually hate rhyming poems (it brings us back to a lot of bad poetry we were forced to read in middle school) but with these poems there’s something charming about it.  there are a lot of aspects to this chapbook that defy our usual dos & don’ts of poetry.  meagan maguire can get away with it.

special shout out to “pray no one will notice you until you’re dead” because sorry meagan, but you’re getting noticed now.  this poem is getting noticed now.  meagan maguire should be getting more attention now while she’s specifically not dead.  go get creeped out her by poetry & revel in it.  please.
one of beyza’s favorite parts of this entire chapbook is the following stanza (beyza loves pigeons more than life itself):

“good news: pigeons seem friendly
even though they eat garbage all day.
when I die a pigeon will eat my left eye 
i think about that and feel okay.”

how fucking awesome was that?
intimate omens is hilariously dark. there’s death and fruits and demons and bells. reading her work reminds us of lemony snicket and how eeriness and comedy can be a great mix if it’s written well.  
you know that moment when you realized you were laughing at three small children whose family keeps on dying in a fire and you feel sort of fucked up but you keep on laughing anyways?  meagan is able to do this sort of thing very, very well.
in summation this chapbook is weird. it’s weird in the way you feel when you are sitting for a certain amount of time then your mom tells you to take out to garbage and you stand up super fast and your head spins out of control. it reads like a scary story with line breaks and stanzas.
instead of handing out candy to your neighboring children on halloween, give them copies of INTIMATE OMENS. they’ll thank you in a few years, probably.
our top three favorite poems are: IN AMERICA THE DEATH OF A LEFTIST IS A RED LETTER DAY, THIS IS A POEM ABOUT THE MODERN CONDITION, and PRAY NO ONE WILL NOTICE YOU UNTIL AFTER YOU ARE DEAD.
buy meagan’s INTIMATE OMENS here: http://intimateomens.tumblr.com
find meagan here: canorouscavalcade & intimateomens